Thread: Social Networking Sites Vs Privacy

Now, I use Facebook and Myspace both personally and professionally - I have a couple of pages that I use to keep in touch with friends and Rhymes with Purple have a number of pages we use to promote events.

My issue is that I've had a lot of people adding my personal pages when it's very clear that they have nothing to do with my professional persona. This has even gone as far as a couple of snippy emails from burlesque performers/fans asking why I keep denying them even though I've never met them or have only done so in passing. I've also had a few random facebook messages asking me to give advice on how to run events/get bookings from people I've never spoken to in my life! Arg!

Now I know that my real name is very much in the public domain (I use it for my acting and directing work) and it's a pretty distinctive name so I'm easy to find on social networking sites but surely people should understand that if my Facebook isn't a Rufus fanpage then it's probably not for public consumption? I like to use facebook for posts like "going to be in pub for next few hours, who's coming?" and would prefer to not have this read by someone I've never met or someone I've only shared a stage with once!

So what do you all think - is any facebook/myspace page fair game for an add or should there be some consideration before doing so. Or do you do what a very good friend of mine has done and have such an obscure pseudonym for your social networking that you could only be added by very close friends? Is is Ok to demand an explanation for a friend denial from someone you've never met but you know from the burlesque scene or forums?

Hmmm. I may become a digital hermit.

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Could you not just put something on your personal page which says something along the lines of: "This is my personal page. I only add actual personal friends here so please don't be offended if I don't know you and refuse. For those with professional enquiries please contact me via RUFUS etc."
I put a bit on my myspace saying " If I don't know you please don't request to be a friend as I won't add you. If you think you know me, message first"
At least you're covered then?
xxx

I know famous people who have secret facebook/twitter etc. accounts with fake names that they only tell their real friends about. That way they never get bothered by fans etc.

So, to recap: I know famous people.

I thank you.

I have 2 facebook pages, a personal one and a professional one. If anyone finds my personal one and sends a friend request etc I politely ask them to add my other fb instead and it hasn't caused any problems.


kisses
PixieParasol

I did have a comment on my facebook for a while but I get the impression that no-one read it. My Myspace is now completely locked and I can only be added by peole who can prove they know me.

My main issue is that everytime I've sent a polite; "this is a personal page" reply along with a denial, it's been taken as an opening by the stranger to start a dialogue that I have no interest in.

Perhaps the problem is that I don't have a personal fanpage, just RwP? Never really felt I merited one. Hmmm.

I've actually got the same problem... I also write for a well-known music magazine and have requests from band members, PRs, etc and despite having a "this is my personal page..." polite request, I've had msgs back as they've got all offended because I reviewed X, Y or Z and I "know" them (yes, I've never met them, either!)... hmmm, it's all a bit awkward, isn't it?

Thing is, do we really want people we've never met looking at our wedding snaps/ kiddie's pics or being able to read all about what we're doing?

For me, having moved from London, where most my friends are, to quite a remote area in Wales, it's my only way of keeping in touch (and keeping sane!!) so I'd rather not get rid of my personal fb account... Which means my privacy is a bit compromised but I guess I have to live with it...

I had a conversation regarding this with Nina Kate who runs jane doe latex.
She has her facebook on lockdown, so she can only add you. Because she likes the privacy, and to be able to go "phew. Hard days work, don't want to make anything more today"
and not have to fear a client or fan going "oh!! I just ordered something though, can you hurry with that?!"

I'd like to be able to say "well that was an awful show, nasty city." sometimes
but I can't - cause I have people who went to the show and who ran it, adding me!!!

My own fault for letting everyone add me I suppose
but it does limit social networking, it's so much easier to concentrate on one profile.
Business always comes first for me, personally.

I think you can set up different groups in Facebook so only friends and family can see photos, or only certain people can see certain status updates and stuff like that.

I know my wife does this so she doesn't have to worry about family seeing sweary posts and stuff like that.

I have thought the same as I don't exactly have a common name either - but I'm running on only page at the moment. Those in the know are aware of a cull coming up but thats transfering burlesque accross to Suzuki's page (when i remember the password)

You don't have to enter into any dialogue if you don't want to. Its harsh but sometimes you have to be to get the message across. You've been polite provided an explanation and thats enough

I would create a Rufus page and let those who know you from burlesque, etc go on there. You more than merit one on your own - and it help seperate your friends. Leaving your personal life personal.
It may help to alter your privacy setting on your own personal page too.

HTH

Originally Posted by Lala Rouge

Thing is, do we really want people we've never met looking at our wedding snaps/ kiddie's pics or being able to read all about what we're doing

I think it's always worth remembering that anything you put online can and will be found by people you'd rather didn't find it. It's the web. Once it's data, it's out there for ever.

Also, as for Joe Black's words about not feeling free to diss a bad gig because they might be reading - that never stops me - I figure: (a) as long as you're being constructive on why it wasn't good, then it might help them make it better, (b) If it was a badly run gig then the worst thing that can happen is that you won't be asked to do a shitty gig again, and (c) fuck 'em.

So, to recap, I know famous people.