Thread: Define Burlesque

Now don't go getting all serious and heavy on me.
This a cutting from one of the tabloid press.
I have highlighted the journalist's description of burlesque.
Not to offend, but because I found it amusing. Do you?
Here is the piece in it's entirety.


DITA TO STRIP AT HARRY'S BIRTHDAY
ABOVE: Charles books saucy Von Teese for Harry's bash: 29th July 2008
IF Prince Charles spent less time nattering to rhododendrons and more chatting to the great unwashed, he might have known who Dita Von Teese was.

And he would have saved himself from the undignified *pickle of accidentally booking an erotic dancer for his own son’s birthday bunfight in September.

The generously-eared royal met the gothic flasher at the toff-infested Cartier International Polo Tournament at the Guards Club in Windsor, London.

Charmed by her alabaster assets, he asked what she did for a living and Dita, 35, replied: “I’m a dancer.”

This vague job description failed to convey that her act involves giving a rhythmic biology lesson in a giant martini glass and doing the sort of things to a massive olive which are illegal in most countries.

Perhaps buoyed by the sun and Pimms and presuming her performance involved a cheeky Charleston, Chazza invited her to perform at Prince Harry’s 24th birthday.

Our man said: “Poor Charles was so embarrassed when he realised what he’d done. He genuinely had no idea about her raunchy stage act.

“She was stunned when he suggested the idea, explaining that his son loved a good dance.

“But he gnawed his fist to within an inch of its knuckle when his aides explained what sort of dancing she did for a living.”

We’re sure Prince Harry will forgive his old man when the burlesque performer toasts his big day with a giant glass of champagne garnished with her own breasties.

WARNING

Warning: This is an Old Thread This discussion is older than 60 days. information contained in it may no longer be current

Oh come on!

"Accidentally booked an erotic dancer"? I'm pretty sure he knew exactly what he was booking!

He might be royal but he's not on another planet!

LMAO - Love it! made me smile properly for the first time today

What dancing is Harry normally into then? Don't quite see him going to the Ballet every chance he gets. And more importantly - What countries did the journalist learn their sex education in?

"This vague job description failed to convey that her act involves giving a rhythmic biology lesson in a giant martini glass and doing the sort of things to a massive olive which are illegal in most countries."

You didn't know? Oh yes, olives are sexual predators in many countries!
:lol:

OOOh don't get me started... :wallbash:

Lol - that explains a lot....

Can I just say 'yeah though!' As if any of that happened. God, the tabloid press are so pathetic.

"We haven't got a juicy story today boss"

"Just make something up then that will either shock the readers or make them fear for their lives"

"Ok boss, will do!"

Oh thank you, that was just what I needed after a long day at work!

I do wonder if the journo has seen her act, I know I've only seen a short version, maybe I missed something?

Something tells me Harry will be well chuffed. As, probably, will his dad!

Heh, well you will read the tabloids.

Aside from anything else I very much doubt Prince Charles makes a single decision on his own, even something as simple as booking entertainment for a party will have a committee of employees to look after it.

Sounds like a rare wee bash though, we are all invited I take it?

x

Misguided as they come, but at least it made us all laugh.

We should find the journalist and send them the link to this thread!