Thread: Vanilla/Burlesque

I've got a question for y'awl.

In my real life, only two people know that I am besotted by the spangly gorgeousness that is burlesque. I went to a workshop in Glasgow in October and had a fantastic time - but only my mother and (after the event!) my hubby knew what I'd done. And EVERYONE on MoB, of course!

Now I can see that my vanilla me and my burlesque me are approaching each other at high speed and I will probably to have to 'out' myself soon. I am a bit concerned about the resulting smash - I really think I'll be a local laughing stock.

I live in a small place. Any advice appreciated on how to handle the moment when it comes :-)

Ta

AliX

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Ha, I have a slightly different problem to you. Everyone around me pretty much knows I do burlesque - except my parents think I'm doing porn! -_-;;

Don't worry if people laugh at you. That's their loss. Just remember you're more fantastic than they will ever be

My mother is still convinced I will get into porn. But if you're afraid you'll be the "laughing stock" then that means you don't have confidence. Just always tell yourself you're the coolest person EVER! : )

I live in a small town too and VERY few people know about my 'burly-life' although I think more people are putting 2 and 2 together which is slightly worrying. Lots of my facebook friends have twigged although I try and keep it very vanilla and save the real burly-ness for myspace.

I am the queen of avoidance tactics. I never confirm or deny anything and I'm quite adept at changing the topic. If people DO twig I just smile!!!! I'm not embarrassed or worried about my burly side but as I work in a school I have to be super-careful. I love my job and can't afford to lose it!!!!

kisses
PixieParasol

Thank you guys - as ever your comments are warmly encouraging.

I suppose I've just got the shakes a wee bit. I mean, it's not like I'm battering children or anything, is it?! LOL!

I've got a business idea that I need to explore further before I know if it's got legs or not...and maybe the whole thing is just a wee bit scary at the moment!

AX

Originally Posted by AliX

I live in a small place. Any advice appreciated on how to handle the moment when it comes :-)

Ta

AliX

Though it's tough to say F*** Em.

Your mum and your bo know you enjoyed the workshop and would like to learn more and im sure they'll be supportive in it.

As far as everyone else is conserned - Sod em.

Life is short and you must do what makes you happy in life, if people don't like it or don't understand your choices, then it's there loss.

And if they judge you on it,,,,, well who are they to judge.

Being the laughing stock of the town ( though honestly i can't see that )
means being the talk of the town.
And who would you rather be in life, the women who goes for what she wants and makes a few waves, or the women who has to live her life threw others and talk about them during the lunch break from the 9 to 5.x

Exactly :cooler:

Alix? Eff U Kay Em.................FUKM. As a Crossdresser I have had to "come out" at various times in my life to utter twats and a lot of decent people who really should know better. I have to say that the amount of "OH MA GAD!!!!" I have got from both types has been about equal.

Recently my mother-in-laws new hubby decided to "confide" in a friend of Louise's that "Did you know her John is a stupid bloody crossdresser? hah hah ha giggle nudge nudge wink wink eh? " The friend only told me about two weeks ago that she knew I was CD. She did say say she didn't care and what I did was what I did but, there was this little look that was saying "Shit, how do I talk to you now though!" So I told her, "I am a cock in a frock, learn to live with it or ignore me and don't come back round when I am in."

BUT, the MOST grief I have EVER got in my life was when I went and got Ordained in 1999. "Yer an effing MEENISTER fer efs sake!! jesus christ wits the wurld cumin tae!!"

Be your self my dear and sod the muppets.

John

I don't think there is a whole lot to be ashamed of. I think educating the people who you tell about your burlylife on the empowering side of burlesque could really open their eyes to why you enjoy it. My teacher just came out with a movie here in the states called "A Wink and A Smile" about six "normal" mothers, wives, etc. who took her Burlesque 101 class and how it transformed their lives. At least here in Seattle, Burlesque is indeed a striptease but also a feminist movement. A lot of people don't understand this.

Believe me, it's not about being ashamed. I'd never be ashamed of any of you - you're all fab!

Hubby is quite unimpressed with my interest. But that's another story :-) Now, my mother, bless her, reminds me of that moment in Ab Fab when Jennifer Saunders' character is desperately trying to find something interesting in Saffy and is almost pleading with her to say that she's a lesbian ;-)

I think my mother would take no end of delight in telling people that her daughter was consorting with strippers ;-) As you say, it beats the 9-5!

It's about being taken seriously in my vanilla life when people find out where my interest lies. I cannot imagine standing up in front of the rest of the Parent Council (of which I am Vice - no jokes please!) and pontificating about school uniform dress codes, knowing that THEY know that dress codes are a bit unusual round at my house :-)

I don't think that I could actually DO it on a stage (I nearly vomited with nerves when I was performing for my Club Noir workshop DVD) and besides, I've left it a bit late in life to decide to become a stripper ;-) This year, for me, it's getting out to burlesque gigs, supporting people, seeing if I fit in.

I suppose there's no point in worrying about a vanilla/burly collision it until it actually happens! Hope my airbags inflate *mwhahahahaha*

*big hugs*

AX