Thread: The Lies We Hear As Kids...

I had a weird flashback a couple of days ago about an incident that happened when my cousin and I were very young indeed. I would have been perhaps three years old.

Anyway, I remembered that we were in his bedroom and I found a pair of his underpants and they had a big skidmark in them.

My cousin, who at the grand old age of four was both a year older and a year wiser than me, managed to convince me that he didn't have skiddy grunties and in fact, they were just a bit rusty.

I am going to be 37 this month - it has taken me in the region of 34 years to realise that he told me a porkie!

However it then got me thinking about all the stuff kids hear and believe and I started wondering if anyone else was hoodwinked in the same way as me. If you have, post the stories here.

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To distrack any of us when we cried my mum would stop look up to the sky and say she had just seen a pink elephant. It worked every time but as we had been crying we had missed them. I totally believed her and once punched a boy at school because he said they did not exist and my mum was a fibber.
Hugs
Diva x

Did the pink elephant wear rusty elepants?

To get me to give up my dummy my mam told me a little lamb whose mummy had died needed it. Took me years to suspect she just tossed it away.

Weird - I used to be into these weird rag-dolls which were called Golly-Wollies (it was the 1970's and political correctness was in its infancy).

I used to enjoy sucking the arms and legs of these things and did so until the age of about three. My mother tried unsuccessfully to wean me off them and failed. Then one day, my grandma sat me on her knee and explained to me that Golly-Wolly had died and was in heaven.

I remember being absolutely devestated at the time and it wasn't until I was about eighteen that my grandmother told me the truth.

Not so much a fib as an assumption on my part (and totally gross)

For years as a child, I was convinced that tampons were McDonalds straws (similar packaging and that)!! I just believed that adult women really liked the McDonalds drinks and kept a stash of straws with them!
What a goon eh?! :P

I don't remember any as a child, but I do have two that I told my own children

I just want to give you a bit of background, I love driving but I hate the sound of wind rushing in when the windows are open on the motorway so I told my kids that if they have the window open they will get sucked out through them (like the James Bond film Goldfinger) - they are grown up and still don't have the window open on the motorway

The other one, again discovered whilst driving, in certain areas you can pick up BBC Radio Sheffield, so as a joke I told my daughter that as a Sheffielder, I have a god given right to listen to Radio Sheffield anywhere in the world. To prove the point we put on Radio Sheffield whilst driving in Bolton, and listened all the way to where I was working.

The funny thing is that although she knew I couldn't be right I'd just proved the point!

Funny the lies your parents tell you isn't it!

My mis-guided sence of humour had me about to type all sorts of sick things. But I'd like some credit for the fact that I have resisted!

My uncle successfully convinced me he was the king of Ireland, for many years.

Also whenever I was naughty my dad would pick up the phone and pretend to phone 'the arabs' to come and take me away (again, like James said, it was the 70s, and PC-ness hadn't yet kicked in). I would hang around his ankles, sobbing and begging him not to do it!

A kid in the library where I work told me that babies come from a star in the sky and that only true love could take a baby from the sky into the mummy's tummy.

Conversely, at her age, apparently I had to be subdued by the nuns at my Catholic infants school when another child said that babies came from under the gooseberry bush and I loudly and stubbornly insisted on giving them the correct facts. God knows why I knew anything about it at that age!