Thread: with all the people in the world, how can someone be lonely

my step dad died a few weeks ago. he was given 2/8 wks to live, i seem to remember

he lasted 4wks..

he had been ill for 6months and no one new what was up with him and even after loads of hospital visits and scans, no one could pin point what was up..

he died of cancer, he was riddled with it and was very very ill and there was nothing anyone could do. he died in pain

my mum and little sister have been clearing his house out (my mum was divorced from him but they still talked coz of my little sis..well, shes 22 ) and they came across an address book. my mum started to look in it to make sure there was no one else that she needed to contact and came across a name scribbled on the back cover..it just said....mr cosmos.. my mum thought it was for a holiday and she asked my sister about it. my sister said..oh mr cosmos is a fictitious character that you write to but dont send the letter to anyone, when you need help and are a bit low. she had told her dad about him.....so my mum shook the address book and a letter fell out..it said....


and this is so sad.. ( i should add that my mum and him had been separated for 10yrs and he never really found another proper girlfriend and was about to be made redundant for the second time..that is why he was asking for a caravan.. read on)



dear mr cosmos,
would you at all be able to help me find a girlfriend..im so lonely and have tried to find one but cant. please please help me... and also i really want to move to wales as i used to go there on holiday and love it, but i have no money and would love to be able to live in a caravan there with my girlfriend..could you help me at all mr cosmos.


this has made my mum cry all day and i think its so sad..i dont want to die and certainly dont want to die lonely. he did, he was 59.

my sister was looking after him when he got taken to the hospice and she was there every day changing his nappy and feeding him..she felt she owed it to him..

my step dad used to take her to a boat show every yr..that was there special day out and he had taken my sister to this every yr for years from when she was little..to give my sister a day off her boyfriend decided to take her there as her dad was too ill to take her..so she had a day off....and...




she payed to go in and she got a phone call and had to come straight back..he had died and she wasnt there,,he died without his only daughter, his beloved daughter by his side...how sad is that.


my mum spread his ashes yesterday...in wales as she new he loved the place.



i soooo dont want to die and have been thinking about it for a few months now. i dont want to be lonely ever. and i know loads of people out there are..

why dont you go and call that friend that you havent spoke to in ages...go call them right now!!!!! or call that great aunt that you havent spoke to in ages.. take a box of chocs to the elderly neighbor down the road and ask him/her if he/she is ok now its turned colder.


i wish id spent more time speaking to my step dad...i hadnt seen him in years

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Oh, hun.... That is so unbelievably sad I'm so so sorry!!

xxxxx

That is so sad, has brought a tear to my eye :cry: So sorry to hear about your loss x

That is unbelievably heartbreaking :hug: :hug: :hug:

Hope you're ok sweetie, sending lots of love and cyber hugs :hug:

Axx

Darling, that is such a sad story, I am just off to work, but I want you to know that I am thinking of you. It's hard to know what to do that might ease your pain. I hope this link might help.
Light a Candle to Remember - Light a Candle in Memory of...
Just scroll down to the Light a candle link.

Oh hun! That is so sad. It made me get all teary! :hug:

I really hope you are feeling ok :hug:

It's prefectly understandable to worry about death after something like this. If it is affecting you really badly it might be worht going to the doctor's.

I know your stepdad was in pain and lonely when he died, but he isn't anymore.

I hope you feel better soon :hug:

You poor lovely and that poor, poor man. My thoughts are with you.

Loneliness is a horrible thing. Please remember we are all here if ever you feel lonely and want a chat. We may not be able to give you a proper hug but we can send cyber ones.

xx

That is so sad, i'm sitting at my work computer trying to keep the tears in. I'm so sorry for you loss.
xxx

He wont be lonely anymore...he will be with lots of friends and people who love him dearly.

Keep those special memories close to you.

Love
Deb
x

thanks everyone. xxs to all.

i keep thinking..whats life all about..you struggle to survive and then die. i dont want to die..i keep thinking that the world wont be the same without me in it..but of course it will. lol. no one will even notice ive gone.

ive started to write my memories down about the place where i used to live with pictures of the place..it was a little village with lots of history and the little old cottages are getting knocked down now. so i have started a memory book for my son to keep

and you no..people say..oh dear when you are in trouble and give you a cuddle and tell you all the right things, the things you want to hear and then they go home, shut there door and forget you. they have there own worries, everyone does. no one really really cares. its the same for me, its the same for everyone...life is so lonely.

sorry, im ok really..i just keep thinking about life and how shit it really is..i have a great life and have fab hobbies...i live on a smallholding with animals,, i have a horse,, i go canoeing/camping. skiing. kayaking amongst other things, but really really my life is shit because im going to die..either alone or in pain.

i have no real true friends..friends that would do anything for you, friends that will always be there for you. but i know im lucky as my dad had cancer last year and hes pulled through and i have a lovely husband who is my best friend..lol. and one great child (and a horrible one that i never see)

and dont think im a sad old lady that has loads of probs and moans a lot coz im not like that..lol.. im a fun person who is always smiling and giggling and overcoming her body hangups..i love to party and can shop for england.. i live in 'chantilly world' so my hubby says well ok he uses my real name..where everything is pink and fluffy and great. my favourite colour is...pink and sparkly.

i want to do something with my life but my life is running out and ive done nothing yet

i just keep thinking of death all the time and how shit it is