Thread: feeling stuck (a rant)

[forgive me, I'm frustrated and need to rant amongst people that can relate!]

I'm trying to get the Merch Girl biz up but the adage "it takes money to make money" is ringing a bit too true at the moment. I don't have any great illusions of wealth; TMG is really my way of getting involved in interesting creative stuff in a somewhat more organised manner. Still, I'd like to actually *afford* to be creative once in a while!

I've been waiting for the $900 stimulus income promised by the Aussie gov, so that I can use that money to pay for business name registration, certification, a mentoring program, etc etc. We have less than 2 weeks left for payments to come (they're going out randomly by postcode) and I haven't seen it yet...I'm worried it won't come at all! then I won't have enough money to even make this venture legit by law!

I've been looking for ways to earn seed capital. There are quite a number of grants that sound awesome, except they require the grantee be an Aussie citizen or PR - I'm neither. (Came here for uni, currently applying for PR.) I've been jobhunting with no luck. I'm thinking of setting up a ChipIn widget to raise funds from contacts & friends, but I already have one close friend telling me off saying "you're not a charity case" and I don't know what I can offer people that pitch in anyway. Free house maiding? Naughty pics? what?

(speaking of which: I've been idly considering being a fetish model, because some pics I've seen are quite yum. But I don't look the part, it's hard to separate the creeps from the legit, and if my parents knew they'd die - they already told me to stay away from burlesque until they were dead :P)

As for burlesque: it's awesome, I love it, I love the classes and the shows I get to see. But I'm not sure how far I can go. I have performed a bit, mainly at our school's Open Day thing (a monthly casual thing), but I wish there was some sort of a Post-Beginner Burlesque Class that dealt with the more business side of things - being licensed, choreographing, creating events, etc etc. I think this got twinged in me 'coz my teacher was talking with us about how this isn't a class for pros or for the "fitness only" people, it's a class for fun and enjoyment. Which is great! But where do people like me, who'd like to get involved in this a little bit more, go? I don't expect to be pro, but I'd like more opps to indulge in my hobby!

so yeah...feeling a bit stuck at the moment. Don't know how I'll make TMG survive, don't know how to grow my creative production & performance self, don't know how to sustain myself. It's a bit depressing, really (I've been dealing with anxiety & depression for a few years now). I hear of people who manage to somehow afford travelling the world without some sort of income, and I think "how come they can do it and not me?"

sigh! have any of you felt like this? How did you cope with the dark uncertain early stages of your career?

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Oh mate, everything you describe sounds very similar to stuff I went through getting funding for a charity I used to run and when I started up as a sole trader. The only advice or support I can offer is to keep on plowing onwards. The best way to deal with fear and frustration whilst you're waiting for things to happen is to take action. Any sort of action so that you can yourself 'not everything is in place yet, but I'm still getting ready for when things do fall into place'. Taking action or making big dream plans so you can think really big when things happen is the best way of getting through the dark days. I hope things start falling into place for you soon. Big hugs

Hi

I share your thoughts and remember how difficult, frustrating, emotional etc.. it is when you are 'trying' to set up a new business venture.

Dont give up, explore every possible option available to you - have you considered sponsorship of your business? maybe you could try approaching some well established companies to sponsor you?

Keep chipping away at it and one day things will come together.

Oh... and keep doing the lotto.

I had a chat with the girls from The Bakery this morning, who do consulting for creative businesses, and they gave me quite a few good ideas. And I just came back from a tax workshop which helped!

I've started a blog for The Merch Girl so I'll be sharing stories and such. TipTop - I'm thinking of sponsorship, I'm just not sure what they'd be sponsoring me FOR exactly and what I could give them in return. Clothes in return for promotion? *ponders*

And now I've got my mum blubbering at me because she thinks I'm selling my body! nothing placates her. sigh...