Thread: Club Noir

where you at club noir last night ?

Oh it was fun,
the outfits ranged from cute to bizzare
the music jumped from decade to decade
the acts were enchanting although few and far between

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Yes, it *was* fun. We left before the second half, sadly, but it was still a grand time.
I just like getting dressed up.

I was quite disappointed with some of the acts, but then some of them were brilliant - the one dancer/gymnast lady was adorable and fabulous, and the wuthering heights scene was unbelievably beautiful. If I was that girl, I would never want to put my clothes on.

Hooray for lots of people wearing hats! I will post a photo of my outfit soon...

i agree that was my favorite act to she was amazing u could really feel the emotion. I felt that the rest of the night was a bit to fancy dress rocky horror show thingy

i was on the look out for u and Kari did u meet her? but there was so many trilbies i couldn't spot hers, and i sed to my hubby that i thought id recognize u from ur photo but it was so busy.

how u getting on with the work shop plan?

To be brutally honest.... we couldn't get out of there fast enough.

Yes - far too Fancy Dress/ Singalonga-Rocky-Horror for my liking. A great night, if that's your cup of tea.... and on such a massive scale which makes it an Experience...but not a single goth/ punk/ rockabilly/ alternative type person to be seen. This was a very commercial "stadium" gig. And that's not my cup of tea...

I saw absolutely nobody there who I knew. None of the old crew I used to know who went faithfully to every one. Having spent some quality time with my crimpers and backcombing I felt very much like the only weirdo at the party. (though I did enjoy a "Desperately Seeking Susan" moment in the Ladies...!)

Acts.... were much better than the last time I went to a Club Noir. There was a bit of variety - it was definitely not "here's another stripper". Quite a few of the acts came across as being trained or professional dancers - I thought the troupe act to "In These Shoes" was very tight and well choreographed. The ballet act was beautiful to watch (although Heathcliff was a bit crap). and I liked the bobby soxer who tumbled her wilkies. I also very much liked the opening act - the girl trio singing Take It Off, a comedy song about Burlesque.

The acts all looked lovely - some beautiful costuming, corsetry, great hair and makeup, a LOT of Swarovski crystals, some big props - the show filled the stage better than it did 3 years ago.

The major downpoints for me - there was no real love, humour or joy in the acts. Most of them didn't really go anywhere with it, or have any kind of punchline. A lot of them just finished by walking off stage to the back corner, like a visual fade out. A lot of moments where the stage was dark and the compere nowhere to be seen, and some acts were outro'd but not intro'd. Plus some acts didn't have a name! "That was Morag, Doris, Magrit and Betty!" is hardly a worthy name check for that troupe.

A couple of the acts in the 2nd half were just rank rotten. Technically well rehearsed (as in, noone f*cked up), lovely sparkly costumes, big props, but ... just didn't do anything with it. A lot of "walk about the stage for a bit looking nice".

And not - one - single - Tassle Twirl! WTF!

A lot of boobs and pasties/ tassles on show, but at no point did anyone really let rip and go for it. There was no big RAAAAR moment for me.

And even though I adore sillyness, kitsch and nonsense, I really was not up for a singalong to "Remember You're A Womble".

wow
u summed the night up perfectly,
all those thoughts u had also whirled about in my head
but u are so much better at writing it down.

It seemed a lot more fetish than burley ?
whats burley about the pet obsessive act
why was 90% dressed in there underwear ? i was looking forward to seeing all the vintage outfits, but no it was like rejects from the moulin rouge

Did u see the guy with no top and fake stab wounds ? bizarre

This is interesting to read, as I haven't been to Noir for a little while now. I would still be up for going because I enjoy the new and original acts but the friends I used to go with now have stopped going because they don't like what it has become and I don't want to go on my own. Last night however I had no money so didn't go.

Last time I went, I had to queue for half an hour at the bar and soon gave up drinking so as not to miss anything. The toilets were a similar fiasco. Also, when Noir first started it wasn't this crowded. It felt more... I don't know.. highbrow?:read: The people who went were all burlesque fans who knew what it was all about. The music that was played was all vintage or old style, gramophones etc and for me that made it very special, very classy and a magical experience.

Now it is completely different. During the club part after the acts have finished, it is impossible to distinguish between Noir and any other mainstream club in Glasgow, such as the Garage. They now play pop and cheese, 80s tunes, Kylie, that sort of thing. If I wanted that I'd go to another club (which I generally don't do as I hate clubbing in these places) and not pay the £15 to do it. I hope they consider bringing back the good old tunes as it just seems they are catering for the mainstream masses not burlesque fans.

It's become really busy, and the clientele have changed tremendously. Especially at Halloween, lots of people decide to go because it's that "mad goth club" and it fills with knobs. And yes, people don't put as much effort into costumes as they used to. Rather than working with the theme, which is always interesting and one of the things that attracted me to Noir, many people see it as an opportunity to wear as little as possible, and you see lots of Ann Summers frilly pants worn over fishnets with corsets. :yuk: Maybe I am now a burlesque snob but it annoys me. It feels like going to a giant hen party and I want to see weird and wonderful, and get to ooh and aah over ingenious costumes that have taken people time to dream up.

For these reasons, I sort of moved towards Rockaburley, Sketchy's and Cheesecake when it was running and loved how they retained what made Noir special to begin with, for me anyway. I would still go to Noir, if I had someone to go with, seeing as it is the biggest burlesque club and the acts are exclusive and often well executed but I generally leave before 1am to avoid the awful music.

I pretty much have to agree with everything everyone's saying... I had never been to the club before, so I have no idea what it used to be like, but it was definitely a lot more... mainstream? feeling than I expected. I still enjoyed myself, but as I say that's mainly just because I like any excuse to dress up.
The number of girls there in their underwear was disturbing. And I did see that guy with the fake stab wounds... some of the outfits were entirely unbelievable, in a very bad way. The funniest thing I saw was probably a woman wearing a corset that could hardly contain her; her nipples were half-exposed. I don't think she knew. I wanted to tell her.

And that sing along was the bane of the evening. It's been in my head ever since...

I didn't go to this one, but I was there at Halloween and I agree. The bar and the toilets are both ridiculous, it's just too busy generally. And I think the point of dress fancy, not fancy dress has been lost. Ok, on the halloween one fancy dress is fair enough. But other nights I feel people just wheel out the same predictable old thing with absolutely no thought to the theme. Mind you, some of the themes are bit vague, which makes it kind of difficult.

i agree too. I always said that it feels like it used to be real and now it has just become commercial. The acts were terrible (even vanity kills looked bored) I hate people in fancy dress that is not the point of burlesque, i have never seen so many anne summers rejects, i was getting looked at for wearing a dress that didn't reveal everything!! although we got filmed drinking champagne which was fun!! Seriously, i'm thinking of auditioning just to get acts the way i want them! Does anyone fancy creating a glasgow burlesque meetup to preserve our sanity?